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Sometimes I lay in bed for long, long spells
Thinking of lines in old movies like
The power of Christ compels you
Or: You maniacs, you blew it up, damn you all to hell!
And while thinking of the first time I heard those lines as a child
My middle-aged woes are temporarily quelled
Sometimes I lay in bed for long, long spells
Wonderin' who killed those kids in Atlanta
Was it Wayne Williams or some other guy
Or was it the Klu Klux Clan?
Based on what I’ve seen and heard, looked like a cover-up scam
Cops coverin' for cops who said they couldn't find the kids
While searchin' a small plot of land
And then the kids were found the very next day when their black neighbors
Took the law into their own hands
Ain't that a thing?
Everyone knows about JonBenét Ramsey
White, blue eyed and blonde
And Nancy Holloway from Alabama
Also white, blue eyed and blonde
But you mention 30 blacks killed in ‘79 through ‘81
Most people say
Never heard of that one
Sometimes to get me out of bed before 2 PM
They need The Jaws of Life
For the news I watched the night before could often have me in a state of strife
I bounce out of it by meditating on the velvety, pastel California colors
I look at them so deeply as if I'm living in my final hours
‘Cause really, when you get to be my age
You don't know when it's gonna be your final day
I talked to a friend earlier this week
His brother just died of esophagus cancer
At the young age of 48
So I read the books that make me laugh, and lately it's nothin’ but John Fante
The way young Arturo argues with his mom relentlessly
The way she scolds him constantly for not vigilantly following her guidelines of Christianity
And when I want to feel validated about my sometimes frowned upon path
I turn to Henry Miller, who continued on far beyond the books for which he was banned
Didn’t matter how old how he got, read the books, watch a documentary
He never stopped laughing he exuded positivity
Then finally I get up and walk to Aquatic or Lafayette Park
Or walk in circles in the Marina in the day and sometimes just before dark
Wonderin' what's next for me in this new world we're livin'?
Some of my friends think that if I walk the boarded up streets that I am sinning
Some people I know shame me for goin’ out and breathing the air I'm breathing
Some people criticize me for occasionally wearing a smile
As if they’d rather watch me perpetually agonizing
Today I woke up knowing the only thing that would lift my mood
Was meeting Caroline in North Beach for Chinese food
Knowing I'd be making music starting at 2
Yeah, the world's shut down, but I won't succumb
I will always make music
I would travel to Ohio though I'm warned not to travel state to state
I miss my family and it's breaking my heart and I gotta look after my mental state
Yeah, I know all about the world crisis
But I also see the Lilies and Irises and the Magnolia trees and the Violets
If people can gather in packs to protest and riot
And burn down Walmart after Walmart and tear down statue after statue
And gather in Oklahoma dressed in red, white and blue
Why can I not get on a plane and fly to Ohio and tell my mother and dad
I love you?
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