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[JENNY]
I'm Jenny
[SARA]
I'm Sara
[JENNY]
She's Sara
[SARA]
She's Jen
[BOTH]
Been best friends forever
[JENNY]
Well, since we were ten
[BOTH]
Met at ballet class
And ever since then
We became inseparable
[JENNY]
The damage was irreparable
[SARA]
Jen's like my sister
[JENNY]
And Sara's like mine
[BOTH]
Friends till the end of the line
Had nothing much in common
[SARA]
Loved horses
[JENNY]
Loved shoes
[BOTH]
But we were attached at the hip
[SARA]
Jen was like a goddess
My mentor and muse
[JENNY]
She was a nerd and a drip
[BOTH]
But we would be together every hour of the day
People would see us and say:
It's Jenny, and Sara
Two peas in a pod
[SARA]
Well, if one pea was perfect
[JENNY]
And one pea was odd
First string-
[SARA]
And spare!
[BOTH]
On the volleyball squad
[JENNY]
Happy and gregarious
[SARA]
My thrills were just vicarious
[JENNY coughs]
[SARA, SPOKEN]
Woo
[JENNY]
She'd point the spotlight
[SARA]
She'd bask in the shine
[BOTH]
Friends till the end of the line
[JENNY]
My skin was just like porcelain
Hers was all zits
[SARA]
My pores were perpetually blocked
[JENNY]
I developed early
She had no tits
[SARA]
My cupboard was woefully stocked
[JENNY]
Why would I be seen
With such a social refugee?
[SARA]
'Cause you always looked good next to me!
[JENNY, SPOKEN]
That's right!
[BOTH, SUNG]
So we were Jenny, and Sarah
A vulgar display
[SARA]
The queen of the prom
[JENNY]
And her weird protege
I starred-
[SARA]
I ran lights-
[BOTH]
In the school cabaret
[JENNY]
I mean, have you heard Sarah sing?
Good golly, it's embarrassing
[SARA sings a feeble note]
[BOTH]
We were contrary forces
Who somehow combine
Friends till the end of the line
[SARA]
Then something crazy happened
Right after twelfth grade
That summer I blossomed and bloomed
I stepped into the sunlight
After years in the shade
And a beautiful swan was exhumed
[JENNY]
Meanwhile, I was working
At the local Dairy Queen
And ballooned up to plus-size sixteen
[SARA, SPOKEN]
Uh-Jenny
[JENNY]
Eighteen
It's just so delicious
[SARA]
We both showed up to college
And, no need to pretend
I was popular right off the bat
And everyone was asking:
Sarah, who is your friend?
The one who's so-
[JENNY, SPOKEN]
Interesting?
[SARA, SPOKEN]
Fat
(SUNG)
All this malice aimed at Jenny
Was quite startling and new
So I did what all best friends would do
I said, I'm Sara
She's Jenny
We used to be close
Now she's desperate, and clingy
And sort of morose
I heard she gobbles
Peanut Buster parfaits by the gross
In all the world is there a sight
More tragic than this parasite?
[BOTH]
So that is our story
And ain't it divine!
Friends till the end of the-
[JENNY]
The cold bitter end
[SARA]
I guess
[BOTH]
This is the end of the line
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